Saturday, September 22, 2012


heaven's pretty cool


all the buildings in heaven have white windows
mondays are wash days and the whole place smells like bleach
jesus considers himself a bit of a songwriter
and no one has the heart to tell him he's just not very good
it's all that awful knowledge and all-knowingness
it really gets in the way of writing a good pop song

oh, you can have baby's in heaven of course (it's heaven!)
and they just appear out of thin air
there is a lot of friction between the people that were born on earth
and the ones that were born and grew up in heaven, though
there's been some discussion about whether or not jesus was an earth baby
because he was conceived in heaven but raised by that crazy lady on earth
(it's weird that she never made it into heaven)
here's how cool heaven is: we don't even think about all
the people that are suffering for all eternity just a few floors down from us
that's pretty neat!

jesus wrote a song once called, 'heaven helps itself to the earth baby's first'
i really tried to like it

8 comments:

Norma said...

We made Jesus up. There’s no point in coming down on him and his made up house and the made up things he does and doesn’t do.

theflowersays said...

Leave Jesus alone. The story of jesus and all his miracles and prosecutions is there for thought and problem solving skills - there are and will always be more interpretations and misinterpretations by the literalness and symbol-isms perceived by us - the almighty human!! that is what is sooo great about the human brain...its nutty !!

Lori said...

In my sick humor this was funny...

Christina said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

Hilarious Bob! Awesome imagination. Ever read Ray Bradbury? The illustrated man? Good stuff

Unknown said...

Nice. I love the smell of bleach and baby's...all knowingness would be very boring and provide little introspect for songwriting. The Heaven baby's think most earth baby's are lazy (probably).
I write bad songs too but feel better about it now, thanks. I would say that I liked His songs. I also think the filter that allows everything to be ok is a very useful tool for Heavenly work.

Anonymous said...

Jesus loves you, Bob. Batman. Whichever. Superman. He even loves Iron Man and nobody really loves him. When was the last time you asked someone who their favorite super hero was and they said, "Oh. I love Iron Man." Never. But Jesus? Loves him. Even though....He's NOT even real. Wait a second....

Fisch said...

I love that crazy Lady on earth! Now I know why you were so freaked out while playing in the church at the Southgate House Revival:-) I too am an artist, I work with polymer clay and one of my favorite creations is to make rosaries. Talk about inspiration... the stories I hear from those that buy from me are good enough to write a song about! Still love your CLEAN music... you were blessed with a beautiful gift!

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